TRYING To Conceive

I have officially become that woman.  I never thought that I would become that woman.  But here I am, and I'm embracing it! 

When Andy and I first began trying to conceive I got a little over zealous, he had to lay down the law and tell me to chill out.  Low and behold, our 5th month trying but not trying we conceived.  Since we lost our first baby, I've managed to hold onto a little bit of my sanity (although Andy would probably disagree).  I've used Clear Blue Easy Digital OPKs, but that it's.  I have to admit that I kind of like peeing on sticks.  Is that so wrong?  The CBE OPKs are awesome too, because they give you an adorable smiley face when positive.  I really love that smiley, it makes me happy every time!

 

This month I have completely gone off the TTC deep end.  We have now tried for 5 cycles since our loss, and have nothing to show for it.  So this month I'm drinking pomegranate juice every day.  It's supposed to help thicken your lining, which will give an embryo more to burrow into.  You drink it from cycle day 1 until ovulation.  So far I have been mixing the pomegranate juice with either Smirnoff or sprite.  I have to admit that the Smirnoff tastes way better with it, and I enjoy drinking it a lot more!  But I can't justify the alcohol every day, as much as I would like to.

Thanks to my trusty OPKs I have a really good idea of when I ovulate.  But this month I have decided to take it one step further.  Charting!  You can find my Fertility Friend link at the bottom of my blog.  I have learned so many interesting things about my body through this journey.  I never knew that just by taking your temperature every morning you could find out so much about what your body is doing!

I have also ordered Preeseed.  It's a sperm friendly lube.  I usually have decent quality egg white cervical mucous (not to brag or anything!), but I decided I'm all in this month.  If it can help, I'm willing to try it!

If this cycle is a bust then we will officially have been trying to conceive after a loss for six months.  That's a really depressing thought.  I really don't want to reach that point!  I know a lot of people say the generic, "relax, it'll happen".  Those people have obviously never lost a baby.  I should be 26 weeks pregnant right now.  I should be planning my baby shower, my nursery, and delivery.  Instead I'm still hoping and praying for a baby.  I now know that even if we get pregnant again, there is no guarantee we will get our take home baby.

But despite all my crazy attempts to conceive this cycle, I still know deep down in my heart that God has perfect timing.  I just hope his timing means a healthy baby conceived this month!