Please Let This Be Ours!

I have thought about this post ever since I started this blog.  I've been thinking even more about it for the last 24 hours.

We are pregnant!

Having had an early loss I am feeling excited, scared, nervous, happy...everything all wrapped up with one conflicting little bow!  We are desperately praying that this is our take home baby (or babies).  Desperately.

I was going to hold out until today to test because I'm going to a bachelorette party tonight and wanted to know before hand (at 12DPO).  But when I woke up yesterday morning I just knew.  It was going to be negative and I didn't want to wait until a happy day to see it.  So I used a FRER.  I was honestly amazed to see a second line!  So I took a digital and a wondfo (I saved my pee, of course because I'm crazy like that). "Pregnant" and positive!  I ran into our bedroom waving the FRER and told my sleeping husband to get up to look at the second line because we're pregnant.  I don't think he's ever woken up more quickly!

We laughed, we smiled, we cried, we prayed.  I called into work to say I was going to be late, there was absolutely no way I could have headed straight in with all the emotions I was feeling.  Andy took me to a donut shop for breakfast, we ate yummy glazed donuts fresh from the oven and kolaches.  I made it into work an hour and a half late but I didn't do a single bit of work.  I mainly sat at my desk and prayed.

I took another test this morning and it's even more positive than the one yesterday.  I know you can't go by the darkness of the line but it totally made me feel better.  I tested out the trigger shot but there was still a part of me that was terrified this was too good to be true.  I go in for my first beta on monday morning.

I'm holding onto the hope and the faith right now that this little one is going to be ours to take home in June.