It's Here

It's here.  The day I have been dreading for so long.  9/10/11.  Our EDD.

When we first were pregnant I imagined this day being filled with tears of the happy variety.  Instead I sit here with sad tears in my eyes and an incredibly empty ute.  After our loss I assumed that I would be pregnant by now.  Instead, today marks CD1 of our very first injectables cycles.

But you know what?  I'm okay.  Mostly.  I did cry some this morning, and I'll probably shed some more tears as this day progresses.  Especially thanks to all my girls on TTCAL who are reaching out to make sure I know that our little one is not forgotten.  What would I do without their support?  I think I would be an emotional wreck that Andy would have to be scraping out of bed this morning.  I know Andy is incredibly thankful for all the support I've gotten through this blog and TTCAL, but I don't know if he truly understands how much better I am functioning because of them.

So today I think about our lost angel.  I know I will get to hold them in heaven one day and for that I am so thankful.

I might do another post later to document fun allergic reactions after surgery and our exciting injectables plan...